It is 4 am and the aroma of fried onions and celery and oregano is bringing me to my knees. The tears are streaming down my cheek. I am listening to a podcast called RISK ( not for the faint of heart). Christine Gentry’s tale of donating her kidney is just pouring through my soul. The onions are browning and gratitude is dripping out my hands. I bet this will be the best mushroom barley soup I have ever made. I cannot believe the life I have and I am grateful for everything that has happened that allowed me to be at these watershed moments of my life. For sure-I still am shaking to my core and as the days draw nearer to the point where I may not have a regular pay check coming in, I spend more than half of them reminding myself there is enough. I think things like ‘ will I be able to buy myself a bag of candy when I want to?’ . I realize how wrapped up into buying things I have become. Then I think’ what if I want to buy some paint?’…you get the idea on and on all the waking day. The soup making brought some relief from these fear monger scarcity thoughts. I realize I am totally present to creating the soup and I just know life is about to unfold for me…that feeling of being responsible for myself and my time and choosing to use it in a way that will feed my soul is …it is…I am not sure there is a word for this…awesome? delicious? huge? connected? Brene’ Brown might call it authenticity?
This week I have 3 W.I.P.’s. and 2 that are done..most of them you have seen the beginnings of last week…
That’s all for this week- Peace Out- till next week- Bec